Dearest Daughter to-be,
The guilt is getting to me. I should know better... I myself am a second child.
Well honey... your Mama is sorry. I am so sorry that I haven't taken as many belly pictures, or that I haven't written as many blogs as I did with your brother's pregnancy.
Maybe this is where I get my self determination from, and where you will as well. Seeing only 5 belly pictures of your pregnancy when Adrayn has 50. You may be determined to prove something subconsciously like I do... or maybe it's just in our nature to challenge ourselves.
I must say in my defense that I am working (on my feet at that), in school full-time, and tending to 3 kids!!! When I was pregnant with Adrayn I was working temp jobs and tending to your half brother and sister when they were with us. Which means that I did get breaks and nightly relaxing baths as well. :)
Thank goodness for your father!!!! If I had to do it all alone I would surely be in the nut house! He has taken on the challenge of feeding us all nutritious meals as he is so beautifully understanding of my lack of time to do so, and he lovingly gives your mama foot and back massages as requested. He may be tough at times, but in the end he is a softy with a huge heart... always wanting the best for his family.
You keep me motivated kiddo. Your little kicks push me to write that paper when I have NO energy left from giving 4 massages earlier that day... your hiccups remind me that you are a sweet little human baby girl that will soon light up my life with indescribable joy. I must admit that I am a tad nervous to meet you... not in a bad way, but in a "My last baby" way. I know that I will not do this again... I know that I am done physically... but knowing that makes your birth all that more unique and special.
I will hold you so dear to my heart my little baby girl. You will be my last newborn diaper, my last breast feeding, my last swaddle. I may not be on top of your belly pictures and blogs, but I will sure as hell be on top my last baby's firsts. I will cherish you sweetheart... so don't you ever feel unloved, as there is an endless amount of love in your Mama's heart to go around.
The guilt is getting to me. I should know better... I myself am a second child.
Well honey... your Mama is sorry. I am so sorry that I haven't taken as many belly pictures, or that I haven't written as many blogs as I did with your brother's pregnancy.
Maybe this is where I get my self determination from, and where you will as well. Seeing only 5 belly pictures of your pregnancy when Adrayn has 50. You may be determined to prove something subconsciously like I do... or maybe it's just in our nature to challenge ourselves.
I must say in my defense that I am working (on my feet at that), in school full-time, and tending to 3 kids!!! When I was pregnant with Adrayn I was working temp jobs and tending to your half brother and sister when they were with us. Which means that I did get breaks and nightly relaxing baths as well. :)
Thank goodness for your father!!!! If I had to do it all alone I would surely be in the nut house! He has taken on the challenge of feeding us all nutritious meals as he is so beautifully understanding of my lack of time to do so, and he lovingly gives your mama foot and back massages as requested. He may be tough at times, but in the end he is a softy with a huge heart... always wanting the best for his family.
You keep me motivated kiddo. Your little kicks push me to write that paper when I have NO energy left from giving 4 massages earlier that day... your hiccups remind me that you are a sweet little human baby girl that will soon light up my life with indescribable joy. I must admit that I am a tad nervous to meet you... not in a bad way, but in a "My last baby" way. I know that I will not do this again... I know that I am done physically... but knowing that makes your birth all that more unique and special.
I will hold you so dear to my heart my little baby girl. You will be my last newborn diaper, my last breast feeding, my last swaddle. I may not be on top of your belly pictures and blogs, but I will sure as hell be on top my last baby's firsts. I will cherish you sweetheart... so don't you ever feel unloved, as there is an endless amount of love in your Mama's heart to go around.
Mucho Love, Sloane!
