First Loves

Dear Parker and Presley,

I have been wanting to write you for so long, but it hasn't ever come together like I'm hoping it will today. My mood is right... the kids are busy with Papa... it is time.

I wanted to thank you from a space that had been untouched in my heart until I met you. My glowing beautiful children... step children...
You have awakened a part of me that I didn't know I could handle. You have shown me a side of myself that I always wanted to be. I am more than thankful to have met you in this lifetime as well as to still have you in my life... in Adrayn and Sloane's life as well.

I remember Parker... when you were so small and shy... then once you warmed up to me you were loud and wild just like your untamed red lion's mane. You were so excited about being outdoors and when you were pent up all winter you were not shy to run around the house naked... I even remember a time when you were showing me how you could blast a toy rocket off of your "boy parts"... yep... I'm sure that will be embarrassing someday... like now. :)
Now, you are more reserved, and protective of your feelings. A bit more video games and books. I still see the fire in your eyes when you and your Papa wrestle or you play in the pool on a hot summer day. I love you dearly my beautiful red headed step child. More than you know.

Oh Presley... my sweet, thoughtful girl... you were only a mere 4 years old when I met you... I am probably the only woman you truly remember your father with. You always wanted to copy everything I did... from my beauty mark to my shoes... this helped me to want to be a better person. Always. Your thoughtfulness has never escaped you, even as you grow older... you have become even more thoughtful! I look forward to our cooking/baking concoctions gone awry! At least we know that it typically takes only 3 times to get it right! I will never forget our taffy pulling, or Kids News... you always know how to crack me up. Love you!

I am so loved, and blessed in this life. I am truly surrounded by the most amazing people... and you two top the charts.

Mucho love my sweets. I know I am not your birth mom, but I do know that I love you more than you will ever know, and to me... that's what a parent is all about.

Littlest love

Dearest Sloane,
My little beautiful girl, you are now over 4 weeks old. It is truly mind blowing how fast time seems to fly by.
You have your moments... blissful baby, to fussy belly baby... still trying to adapt to our world, I'm sure. I have already gone back to work and you seem to be managing just fine with your very attentive Papa.
Your older brother, Adrayn, was a bit curious and a tad jealous of you initially... but that seems to have worn off, and he is just plain old curious and loving these days.
He wants to hold you and kiss you on most days, and when you fuss in the car he is sure to be the first to peek under the blanket and shush you back to sleep.

Papa still cannot accept the fact that you look just like him. I think a part of him is a little nervous that you could still change your looks and he is remaining reserved just in case. There is no denying it my love... you are Papa's little girl indeed.

Parker and Presley adore you as well. We all hope that they will be more of a presence in your life than they have been these last few months as life is fleeting, and in the end... what really matters is family. I know you will adore your biggest brother as you seem to have a serious temperament much like his... and you will adore the thoughtfulness and boisterous humor of you big sister... your brother Adrayn sure does!

I know you change on a daily basis, but I just wanted to write this little love letter before time slips away yet again.

I love you my sweet.
I love your coos.
I love how your curious eyes wander.
I love how you stare at your brother while he entertains you with a dance, or a silly voice.
I love your tiny feet and how they wiggle.
I love how you cling to me at night.
I love how soft your hair is.
I love how your Papa glows when he looks at you.
I love how serious you seem to be with your little furrowed brow (just like Papa).
and most of all, I love to feel your warm little body while you nurse when I get home from work.

I know that this list will only grow with time, and I am truly blessed to have such a beautiful family to love and share this life with. I know you will love this family too my sweet.

Sweet Dreams my little heart,
Mama